40831 Balch Park Rd Unit D #NA · Apartment for Rent

HOLY CRAP - A HOUSE WITH ITS OWN RIVER! 🌊 (Yeah, you read that right) Look, I'm gonna level with you. If you're scanning rental listings looking for another cookie-cutter house, keep scrolling. Because this isn't that. This is your "I can't believe places like this still exist" moment. Picture this: You're sipping your morning coffee (or that fancy green juice you love), listening to actual river sounds. Not some meditation app. A legit river. In your backyard. On your own acre+ of land. And the best part? You're only 33 minutes from Porterville Airport. Which means you can hop between your SoCal life and your private sanctuary faster than most people's daily commute. The specs (because apparently, those matter): 3 bedrooms (each with their own bathroom - no morning traffic jams) Pristine well water (bye-bye, LA tap water) Enough space to finally write that book/start that podcast/master handstands Zero nosy property management companies (deal directly with yours truly) Here's the deal: I'm not looking for just any tenant. I want someone who gets it. Someone who: Values peace and quiet over party central vibes Actually responds to texts (revolutionary, I know) Treats homes like they're not disposable Has their financial act together If you're thinking "I need my own consistent slice of paradise that isn't some random Airbnb," then we should talk. The perks of commitment: Lock in for a year (and prepay), and I'll knock 5% off your rent. Because I like people who know what they want. Fair warning: In my 10+ years of real estate, I've never seen another rental property like this. And I'm not just saying that because it's mine. Want in? Let's chat. $3000/month P.S. That $3000/month? It covers everything. Utilities, landscaping, the whole shebang. Because life's complicated enough without juggling five different bills. You write one check, then go back to listening to your river. Simple.